Adoption Journal

Friday, October 14, 2005

Things are moving....

I had my blood tests today. I have found a lawyer (have to still call her) and I have spoken to the clinic in PA. Things are moving along. We could have those 4 embies defrosted and into my uterous in 6 weeks. Yesterday I walked by a maternity clothing store and kept thinking....."next year I WILL BE SHOPPING HERE". Not, I want to be, but I WILL be (especially since I have given away all my maternity clothes).

Can we do this in 6 weeks, YES WE CAN!

We have not mentioned anything to my parents yet, but we will soon. We are speaking to Sue and Matt tomorrow morning. Maybe after that.

Dare to dream?

Monday, October 10, 2005

Wow, it has been so long since I have been here

It has been months since I have posted. It has been months since I have had anything to post. There is still no news on Russia. Our agency has no accreditation, and no hope of it coming anytime soon. We are looking into other options, but it is so hard. We are hoping that a couple from PA will donate their embryos to us, but I am still waiting to hear back again from them, after speaking with them 2 nights ago. I hate waiting. 3 years of waiting, is what I have been doing. I feel like I only wait, and cry. With a few good days thrown in.

I wonder when we are going to be getting those jumpy happy men.....Will I ever be pregnant again? Will I ever be able to adopt? When is our turn?

Wow, all this sadness, and I have not even had a glass of wine....just a box of chocolate. Stupid me, I am in the 2ww, and think it is bad to drink, even knowing that I am not pregnant and could never be on my own.

Sadness depart, leave gladness in my heart.